where's my bloody invite?
sometimes my dad comes over a bit ray winstone and gives me a gold watch in a gruff way.
he got married on new years eve and i’ll write about that another day.
love the watch. it’s got me back into gold.
the bracelet was a perfect birthday gift from a while back. the girl who gave it to me is working on a play i’m seeing tonight.
i got another film developed. believe it or not these are the best pictures.
i’m going to get a digital slr, i don’t know which one. your tips would be very welcome, i’m all at sea.
nothing radical, just the same old for the time being whilst i get back into the blogging habit…
how did i get to be 24 so soon? it is 2010 and i feel 18. today i felt 18. today i was scared when i realised i was 24. today i was scared when i realised six years have passed since i was ever 18. today i found some poems i wrote when i was 16 and i heard people on the radio writing letters to their 16 year old selves. once i wrote one. i will try and write one now
‘dear girl,
you are brave and arrogant and you are in pain. you will make more mistakes. you will get more things right than you could ever imagine. now your dreams have come true you divide your feelings by two. never feel so alone. still lonely sometimes. right now you lash out alone, but you won’t for so long. in the next two years you will change so much it will take your breath away. one day you will sit and you will understand what you have in common through those years – it is what your family taught you. it is the importance of feeling close, of loving people. so you take care, of yourself and the others. i won’t spoil the surprise, except to say you won’t always feel so sad and scared. your dreams will come true.
love always
el’
some things mean so much to so many people. this song is one of them.
sorry that you happened to me? no. i don’t know where i end and you begin. i don’t know who i would be if it weren’t for you.
and now i am 24. dazed.
This blog’s on hold whilst other things take over. Just thought I should fessup and explain my absence from your posts and the quiet here.
as we arrived a storm blew in.
(apologies for the shoddy camera, i hope you can get a glimpse of what the sea was like that night, reflecting the town’s orange light)
we took a walk and it was like the wind had blown everyone else away.
i was thinking about this blog, and i came to thinking again about why it’s here. couldn’t really come up with much of a reason other than enthusiasm, which has been pretty vacant from these parts. so i’ll get onto that. fact.
so things that have been pleasing me lately
fireworks, flowers, bon jovi, christmas coming, cat staying at the flat whilst mum swims in egypt, buying poetry books, painting my nails, cooking loads, snooping round second hand furniture shops, planning window-boxes, the return of red wine into my life, my dad being head over heels in love, gothy videos and a would-be silk shirt i bought a couple of weeks ago. and once again going brighton this weekend to see lucie-lou. seems like b-town always kick starts this blog so fingers crossed for that then.
bisous
we made these totoros from felt and sketches and lots of stitching time.
they’re the boy’s books – i can’t speak french.
here are some things from elsewhere. i was playing with a different camera, seeing how i’d do at making somewhere familiar look interesting again to me.
it’s not quite the calm neatness of blushing ambition but I don’t think anything in my life will ever quite match that…
